Welcome to The Alateen Express 2000!
Welcome to the first issue of the Alateen Express, your Northern California Alateen newsletter. Now some of you may be thinking, gee, I didn’t know we even had a newsletter!, but we do. The Express is written by fellow Alateens and the Alternate Northern California Alateen Coordinator.
We are always looking for input from fellow Alateens, so if want to share your experience, strength, and hope PLEASE send us material for publication. Of course, we publish only with first name and last initial, and city of residence. Please understand that we cannot guarantee that we will be able to publish all material and that the material may be edited.
Finally, we are interested in feedback about the format and content of the Express, so if you have any suggestions please let us know.
As many of you know, January 1, 2000 not only resulted in a new century, but also a new selection of officers for Al-Anon/Alateen Northern California officers. Along with a new delegate, and other Northern California officers, we have a new Alateen Coordinator and Alternate Coordinator. Your new Alateen Coordinator is Jennifer F. from San Jose.
In a nutshell, Jennifer’s responsibility is to support and represent Alateen at the Northern California Level. Jennifer’s column in this issue explains in detail her responsibilities and our plan for Alateen for the next three years. Supporting Jennifer, as the Alternate Alateen Coordinator, is me, John C. from Santa Clara. I’m looking forward to being of service. Please call or email with questions or suggestions. Thanks!
John C., Santa Clara
Greetings to all Alateens and Sponsors. I am really looking forward to this new and exciting journey in service and recovery. Alateen has always been a part of my life and always will be. I have been involved in service work for the past 10 years and have served recently as Alateen Coordinator for Santa Clara Valley Intergroup for 5+ years.
John and I have visions and goals of where we would like to see Alateen be in Northern California. We have set a goal of increasing Alateen participation by 10% overall in the area. We will first have to survey all Alateen groups in order to get a starting number. We will be working on this over the next year or two. I would like to see more Alateen participation at the annual NCWSA Convention, NoCAC and other Al-Anon and Alateen events. Another plan is to increase the awareness of Alateen by doing public outreach, especially to schools. I would like to encourage Alateen meetings to have Open meetings to not only help people be aware of Alateen, but also as an excellent way of recruiting sponsors. Please do not hesitate to contact me if you have any questions.
Jennifer F., San Jose
Please call Jennifer or John if you have any questions:
Jennifer F. at (408) 445-2385 or (408) 951-9216 and John C. (408) 243-5368
Special Thanks to Julie W. and Clint W. for all of their work the last three years as the Alateen Coordinator and the Alternate. We hope to be able to keep up the level of dedication and enthusiasm they had for Alateen.
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March 31, April 1 & 2: NCWSA Annual Convention, at Crowne Plaza Hotel in Milpitas. For Info call Charli D. at (510) 526 – 4687 June 2, 3, & 4: AFG Growing Together Weekend, at Occidental, CA. For Info call Dale W. at (510) 494-8564. June 23, 24 & 25: NoCAC Bash 1, at Greenhorn Campground, Rollings Lake Resorts (near Grass Valley). For Info call Christy (510) 471 – 9756. July 2000: Southern California Alateen Conference.
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It was really awesome to hear that everyone had a blast at NoCAC last year in Fresno. I am really looking forward to seeing everyone at our up coming shindigs/fund-raisers.
Though the committee got off to a late start we have been working our wings off and are looking forward to a great year together. A flier will be sent out when we know for sure when our first Fund-raiser is going to be, so watch for our fliers!!! And please if you have any questions please feel free to call me for info.
Huggs and PiXiE Dust,
Christy (aka PiXie)
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My inspirations for alateen were caused by my pain and sorrow towards my mother. I remember the first meeting I had, I felt safe enough to speak about my mom. Alateens have a sense of comfort and you don’t feel nervous. I had friends in Alateen and I didn’t even know they were part of the program. I also made friends in Alateen. I have felt good about myself ever since I joined the program. It just helps with all the stress you are going through. And I would just like to thank Alateen.
Brian F., Sonoma
I have been at Alateen for four months. The first two meetings I didn’t say anything except my name. Everybody was real nice. After a month of being in Alateen I had nothing to hide. I knew that everyone was just like me and that some people were even in the same position as me. It really helps you a lot. Especially since nobody lets the things we talk about go out of the group.
Anonymous
How do I say goodbye?
How could you die?
Why did you leave me?
After all we’ve been through
Now I don’t know what to do
I remember us running around
What friendship we found
I loved seeing you
You were the one I told my secrets to
I told them all to you
Then in a flash you were gone
Right in the flash of dawn
All the tears you brought
I wish you were still here
I want you back, dear
I thought we’d see forever
But forever’s gone now
And so are you
All I want to tell you is I’ll love you always and forever
I can’t wait to see you again
I love you and goodbye my friend.
Heather H.
Well, this weekend started out kind of depressing, because two of my best friends in program weren’t here. I felt like two-thirds of me wasn’t here. But then I saw another one of my friends who couldn’t come last year. I had missed her a lot, and she really cheered me up. I had a lot of fun this weekend and it’s due to old friends being here when I needed them. So keep coming back, even if things aren’t working good for you. There could be somebody here who really needs what you have to give.
Steffo
My name is Alicia C. I have been in Alateen since I was six years old and I am now fourteen. That is nine years. I have been to NoCAC for three years straight. Alateen has helped me a lot through my troubles. The first time I came I was immediately welcomed and every time I have felt like I belong and don’t always feel that way when I go somewhere else. I have met a lot of friends who are in the same situation and know what it’s like. That is something really special. And there is always a special love between people who attend NoCAC that you won’t find anywhere else. You always know that someone cares. I think that NoCAC is an absolutely wonderful place to come to. And if it wasn’t here, then I don’t know what I’d do. Alateen is great so I’m going to keep coming back, because it’s true that it really, really does work.
Alicia C.
I think that Alateen is a great inspiration for kids that have problems with alcoholics. It helps kids find love (something a lot of us don’t get) and happiness. NoCAC is also a great thing for everybody to meet new people and a whole bunch of people that are as screwed up as us. They also find lots of love here.
Tara C.
Ceres Unity Alateen
Peace! Love! Fun! Food! And fellowship.
No strings, no conditions, no judgements. May this cup full of NoCAC spill over to the outside world and spread the message that Yes!! We can get along if we practice these principles in all our affairs.
Carl F. S.
Alateen Sponsor, Dist #6
When I first came here, I felt so alone, cold and distant. My two friends and I came here to Fresno from Santa Rosa. When I got here, my first night I wanted to go have. But as I walked around, people hugged me and introduced themselves. They made me feel so welcome, and that made me feel better inside. When I cried, they were there to comfort me. Normally I would have to cry alone. This has been a very emotional, spiritual, and most interesting, but wonderful experience for me. I’m hearing impaired and partially deaf. I felt that I was being punished being here. It was loud, noisy, and very scary for me. I couldn’t hear anything and I felt so deserted and so alone. By coming here I found out so many things about me that I never knew, or feelings that I’ve never shown to anyone before. I’m ready to go home to my group and work on the steps as hard as I can. Overall, my experience was scary, but wonderful. Everyone made my first NoCAC a blessing to be here! I truly know now that there are people all around the U.S. who are in my shoes, too. I am not alone.
Anonymous
I went to the friendship workshop. While I was there I wondered, "How can you describe friendship?" So I wrote this down:
Fellowship, fun
Reason, voice of
Insanely fun
Endure, eagerness
Never let go
Detachment
Smiles, sadness shared
Hugs, happiness
Inspiration
Presence, persistence
Friendship is also understanding, love, listening, and caring. Can you think of some more?
When I think of Alateen a poem comes to mind that was given to me by a school counselor. It’s called "Don’t Quit":
When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh.
When care is pressing you down a bit—
Rest if you must, but don’t you quit.
Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar.
So, stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit –
It’s when things go wrong that you must not quit.
You’ve heard about it in your meetings. It’s discussed at district business meetings. You read about it in newsletters and pamphlets. It comes from the World Service Office and its Operation Alateen. So what’s it all about? Operation Alateen is one of Al-Anon’s focuses this year, and its goal is to get Al-Anon more involved in supporting Alateen. This is a wonderful and important goal. The two groups are dependent upon each other for survival. Alateens are our future!
All that said, I’d like to tell you about how some of us in Northern California have been getting Alateens and Al-Anons together for the past 18 years. Every spring, the Growing Together Weekend at Westminster Woods brings a mix of Alateens and Al-Anons from throughout the area together to share their experience, strength and hope. The retreat takes place at a campground near Occidental and the Russian River. Accommodations include heated cabins with bunks, bathrooms with showers and tasty food prepared by the camp staff. Planned by a committee made up of Al-Anons and Alateens, the retreat features speakers, workshops, and plenty of entertainment and easy-does-it time. Each speaker meeting gives both an Al-Anon and an Alateen an opportunity to share their story. The workshops are both led by and attended by members of both groups, giving Alateens and Al-Anons an opportunity to share with and learn from each other in a small group meeting. Easy Does It Time gives those in attendance yet another opportunity to interact. Small groups take hikes through the forest surrounding the campsite. Volleyball, softball and football games spring up in the field. Some prefer to sunbathe or play in the swimming pool. Following the Saturday night meeting, there is both a dance and a campfire, complete with toasted marshmallows.
This retreat is a special place for me. It is where I first got involved in service. I was on the committee in 1994 and served as the chairman for the 13th annual retreat when I was only 21 and making the transition into Al-Anon. I haven’t missed a year since. Working on the committees gave me an opportunity to meet Al-Anons and learn that they were people just like me, only a little older. This was very important to me during my transition period. It also gave me a chance to get to know many other teens and young adults that have become very special friends today. The mix of Alateens and Al-Anons is what makes this a special event. I hear a little piece of my story in every story told there, and I learn from them as well. It truly is a place for growing together.
This year, Growing Together Weekend will be held on June 2,3 and 4. For registration or questions, call Dale W. (510) 494-8564 or look for the registration packet at your meetings. I look forward to seeing you all there.
Caren W., Fremont
1. Notice them
2. Smile a lot
3. Acknowledge them
4. Learn their names
5. Seek them out
6. Ask them about themselves
7. Look in their eyes when you talk to them
8. Listen to them
9. BE NICE!
10. Tell them that their feelings are okay
11. Be honest
12. Be yourself
13. Hug them
14. Notice when they are acting differently than normal
15. Present options when they ask for your council
16. Share their excitement
17. Call to say hi
18. Give them space when they need it
19. Discuss their hopes and dreams
20. Laugh with them
21. Be relaxed
22. Tell them how terrific they are
23. Create a tradition and keep it
24. Use your ears as much as your mouth
25. Make yourself available
26. Find a common interest
27. Apologize when you have done something wrong
28. Keep a promise you make
29. Wave, smile, or hug when you part
30. Thank them
31. Point out what you like about them
32. Give lots of positive comments
33. Encourage win-win solutions
34. Give them your undivided attention
35. Ask for their opinion
36. HAVE FUN TOGETHER!
37. Meet their friends
38. Be exited when you see them
39. Tell them about yourself
40. LET THEM ACT THEIR AGE!
41. Be consistent
42. Admit when you make a mistake
43. Enjoy your time together
44. Unwind together
45. Be happy
46. Ask them to help you
47. Support them
48. Applaud their success
49. Come to their dances
50. Believe in them
51. Be flexible
52. Delight in there uniqueness
53. Let them make mistakes
54. Give them immediate feedback
55. Include them in conversations
56. Respect them
57. Be understanding when they have a bad day
58. Respect the choices they make
59. Be silly together
60. Hang out together
61. Make time to be with them
62. Accept them as they are
63. Talk openly with them
64. Trust them
65. Create a safe, open environment
66. Be available
67. Be sincere
68. Give them your phone number.
69. Share a meal together
70. Talk directly together
71. Be spontaneous
72. Expect progress, not perfection
73. Remember their Birthday Day
74. Welcome their suggestions
75. Love them, no matter what
Joel H., Milpitas
One Final Note
If anyone would like to submit items to the Alateen Express or has an address update, please send all correspondence for the Express to:
Alateen Express
P.O. Box 110366
Campbell,
CA 95011
For information about attending a meeting,
click here
For information about purchasing Al-Anon or Alateen literature,
click here
Copyright © Northern California World Service Area of AFG,
Inc